A few of my favorites... so far.

checking in

Please bear with the bullets. My brain is a little mushy from lack of sleep and I'm still learning to type one-handed.

My thoughts on the last couple of weeks:

• breastfeeding: Holy crap, this is challenging. I know it didn't help that we started out with a sick baby and a special care nursery full of medical professionals hovering and pushing formula, but I can see why people throw in the towel. E and I are both learning quickly, but I think we'll need to seek out some tech support for his latch. If his growth is any indication, he's getting plenty to eat. So what if my nipples feel like they are on fire 24/7, right?
• can't live without 'em items: B.oppy, itzb.een timer and LOTS of receiving blankets. I knew these things were invaluable after our first few hours home and the days that have followed have only reinforced my initial assessment.
• newborn clothes: Not actually made to fit newborns, it seems. My infant is not particularly small (75th percentile and up on all measures) and the only clothing he doesn't swim in are the couple of preemie things I bought to have on hand "just in case." We had to go out last weekend to buy more teeny onesies and sleepers to get us through these early days. We're already doing laundry several times a day and we couldn't keep up without getting a few more things into the rotation.
• cloth diapers: Like the clothes, he just swims in the beautiful cloth diapers we have washed and waiting in his changing table. We could get some smaller ones but you can't just buy one or two. We'd need enough for a full couple of days for it to be worthwhile and it just doesn't make sense to buy that many when he'll most likely fit into what we already have in a week or so. So, it's disposables until then, despite the anguish this causes M who can't wait to stop assaulting the environment.
• our son, the transformer: If I hadn't watched the changes take place before my very eyes, I'd have sworn they sent me home with the wrong baby. Elliot looks different to me every single day. His little features are changing so dramatically. He hardly resembles the baby they handed me two weeks ago.
• c-section recovery: In a word, ouch. I know it's major surgery, but I'm discouraged by how much discomfort I am still experiencing. I ran out of the Good Pain Meds a few days ago and it didn't take long to see how Good they really were.
• sleep: Oh god how I miss sleep.
• the birth story: I'm not ready to write it just yet, but I'm getting there. It was hard and scary and I have some more of my own processing to do before documenting it.

I've been sick for the last few days - not sure if it is c-section related or just a bug - but it is a total drag. Luckily for me, Elliot is about a easy a baby as I've ever met. I don't know what I'd do if he was high needs. It's been taking every ounce of my limited stamina to keep the kid fed and in clothes that aren't soaked with spit-up. (Did I mention we're having a spit-up problem? We're having a spit-up problem. Poor kid regurgitates an alarming percentage of each meal. He also has hardcore, body-shaking hiccups several times a day. His pediatrician says not to worry about these things as long as he continues to gain weight, but my heart breaks for him. It can't be comfy and he's already gone through so much.) Anyway, I have an appointment with my OB today and I'm hoping she can help me figure out what's up so I can be on the road to recovery.

I'm horribly behind on blog reading/commenting - my apologies. Once we have some semblance of a baby routine around here, the normal life stuff can get added back in... I hope! :-)

backdated

3/24/09: I wrote the following post on Saturday night but didn't publish it because I didn't have time to finish it to my satisfaction. I'm only just now returning to it. This mom gig is really time-consuming! 

It's still not anything special, but it was written during a special time, so here it is:

Briefly, on accounta the baby sleeping on my chest...

That's right, I said there's a baby sleeping on my chest. Bliss. :-)

Elliot has been home now for just over 24 hours and I couldn't capture those hours in words if I tried. Phrases like "sleep deprived" and "head over heels in love" and "overwhelmed" and "terrified" and "awestruck" simply don't seem adequate in this application.

Elliot 1 day old

change of plans

M here:

First of all, thank you all so much for your kind words and enthusiasm, it has been a joy to read your comments as they have come in and we truly appreciate it.

K is recovering well from her c-section. She is getting up and around some and I think is feeling more and more human every day. Looks like she will be discharged Wednesday. She has been so brave and I'm so proud of her.

Elliot is also doing very well but has indeed developed pneumonia (it was a possibility after his delivery, we were hoping he would fight it off) and needs to stay in the special care unit for 7 days to receive antibiotics. We are pretty crushed that we won't be able to get him home before this weekend. He is improving so much though, the respirators have been removed and has even been doing very well breastfeeding. We understand though, that really we are really lucky, 7 days is peanuts to what some Moms have to endure before getting their babies home.

I just can't wait for the day that our family is home together and have all this behind us.

It's a boy!

Elliot Arthur made his way into the world early Saturday morning. He and I are both recovering from some effects of a difficult labor and delivery but we're doing well. He is such a fighter and M is wearing a path in the carpet between our separate hospital floors.

He was 8lbs, 4oz and 20.5 inches. I tried to post a picture but I can't get it to work on M's phone. I'll get one up when I can, along with more details about the last couple of days.

I haven't been able to spend much time with him yet but I've had long enough to know I'm head over heels in love.

even quicker update

This is M writing, (popped home to walk dog and grab forgotten items) K asked me to write a post for her.

No baby yet, but soon we think/hope.

So far not much has gone according to those hopes. K's contractions became overwhelming and ended up exhausting her last night, so to the hospital we went.  Medical interventions are the name of the game there and we succumbed  to the necessity of the situation.  We are hoping still for a vaginal birth but understand that we might not even get that.  On that note, here are some positives to end on.

--K is doing awesome, she worked though 32 hours of horrendous contractions all by herself and was really brave, I'm quite proud of her.  

--Our doula (a good friend) has been great, sitting in front of the door to stop nurses coming in and poking and prodding and overall just being a great support to me.

-- Looks like we'll have a baby by the end of the day one way or another.

Its been a little heartbreaking to see our birth plan slowly chipped away at.  I know that a birth plan is inherently not a plan and just hopes and wishes but its still tough to let those go.

I'll post with news when I can, seems my iPhone doesn't love posting to this site, but I'll keep at it.

ps... I haven't slept so if this is all wonky and nonsensical, please forgive.

even quicker update

Contractions have been about 10 minutes apart for the past two hours and, strangely enough, more manageable. I think being on the even cycle is regulating my hormone levels or something. So on that note, I'm going to try to get a little bit of rest. The current plan is to re-evaluate things in a few hours, or sooner if we fail at sleeping! We may head over to the hospital at that point - not to be checked but to take advantage of their 24-hour, climate-controlled, well-lit environment for some walking. And if things happen to escalate there or my water breaks, well then we'll be in the right place.

Edited to add: No sooner did I hit the post button on that "more manageable" bit above than I got hit with a whopper of a contraction. Argh!! I think my hopes of sleep may not be exactly realistic after all.

quick update

Contractions have been going strong since last night, as in ALL night, so no sleep for me except for some mini-snoozes in between the pain. Unfortunately, they never stick to a clear pattern for more than an hour or so, and the closest ones are still 10 minutes apart. They were most regular from about 3-7am and also getting closer together during that time (started out about 18 minutes apart and made it down to 10). At that point, I was pretty sure today was going to be the day but now it looks unlikely. In the last few hours, I've had some that were 10 minutes apart and some that were over 30, so... not looking like much of anything right now.

M is being a super-star. Many of the contractions are testing the limits of my pain threshold and there's no way I'd be making it through without her.

the p word*

I'm not going to jinx myself by using a certain term, but I will share the following:

1. Internal exam today at my doctor's appointment. I am "a good 2 cm dilated" and "thinning." I made my next appointment for Monday but she said she truly didn't expect us to make it that long and her guess would actually be that we'll have a baby by the weekend.

2. Spotting and signs of losing my MP (I'm sorry, I just can't use that term either) this morning, both of which increased after today's internal.

3. I had about an hour of very strong, very regular contractions (every 8 minutes) during the night last night, but they gradually tapered off into the early morning and were nearly gone altogether by my appointment today. As of this afternoon and evening, the strong ones seem to be back in town. I haven't had a chance to time them yet but my sense is that they are currently about 10-15 minutes apart. I hope I'm able to get some sleep tonight.

And that's all. As I said, trying not to jinx myself here. I'll post more as soon as there is more to post. In the meantime, thank you SO much for all of your comments. Knowing all of you are out there cheering us along helps a lot, cheesy though that sounds.

*In case you can't figure out where I'm going here, the word starts with a p and rhymes with shmogress and I'm refusing to claim it because I'm tired of prematurely declaring things underway. :-)