Wednesday, January 23, 2008

one must always remember to laugh

And now, some comic relief from the craziness that is my life, because if you don't have a good sense of humor, you have no business reading a blog about two lesbians navigating this three-ring circus we call advanced babymaking.

M and I stopped by Target the other day to buy pregnancy tests. While there, we found a Williams-Sonoma cookbook that needed to come home and live with us as well. So, we took our tests, our book, and our $1 off coupon for the tests (we have no shame) and proceeded to the express check out. Our checker was a 20-something kid with his pants belted a good 8 to 10 inches below his waist who was perfectly fine with us being in his lane... until he noticed what we were buying. Apparently, two blatant lesbians** purchasing pregnancy tests and a soup cookbook was just a little too much reality for his evening. He dropped our purchases quickly into a bag and wordlessly waved our receipt about a foot out of my grasp. I might have considered this rude, but it wasn't like he knew he was doing it. His gaze was a full 180 degrees the other direction - how could he have seen where my hand was, or in this case, wasn't?

But wait, there's more. As we were leaving the store, I glanced at the receipt before dropping it into the bag. On the top of the receipt is one of those automatic coupons that is generated by something you purchased. Any guesses? It was for $1.00 off Kotex products! "Hey, just in case those tests you just bought don't work out for you, come back and we'll knock a dollar off your tampons!" How very considerate.

(Incidentally, 2 of the 3 tests in that box have been used and have been negative. It looks like we are well on our way to strike-out #13. Against all rational thought, M and I managed to work ourselves into a flurry of high hopes for this cycle so it's been a sad couple of days around here. On the flip side, I am happy to be days away from checking off the first of our last two cycles before our IVF consult. Bring on the better odds, baby!)

**I should note here that I've been sick and holding down the couch for the past few days so I was looking a little ragged on this particular field trip. I'm not saying that lesbians in general are dirty or unkempt or whatever. I am saying that there is a noticeable decrease in my own tendency to pass for straight when I am (a) out with M, who has more external gaydar triggers than I do, and/or (b) looking less primped and fluffed than usual. On this occassion, we had both factors at work, so I know he had us pegged.


Inlocoparentis said...

So sorry, my love. I had a nearly identical experience at Target buying OPKs last night - are we on the same wavelength or what?

Anonymous said...

You'd think plenty of people make discheveled trips to Target for hpt's and the clerks would think it's so passe. But lesbians! Sometimes I forget how shocking we are to some people. I'm so sorry for your negatives and am putting all my juju on your last IUI pre IVF. ox