Monday, August 4, 2008

statistics and symptoms notwithstanding

Still over 24 hours until our next ultrasound and I can not turn off the fear. It's crippling. I'm sitting at work staring blankly at lists and stacks of paper because I can't motivate myself to do anything else.

I don't know how we'll piece ourselves back together if that little heartbeat has gone away.

We painted our announcement plate yesterday. It won't be ready for pick-up until the afternoon we leave, so we'll be grabbing it on our way to the airport. We waited until the last possible second to have our news fired into ceramic - I hope we weren't premature in spite of our waiting.

9 comments:

mulberry said...

k - deep breaths, the little heartbeat is there until proven otherwise!! embrace it's little tiny thumps (even though you can't feel them since they are still so small) and accept this blogland hug of encouragement. you are doing great... it is easy to get scared about all the things we can't do anything about, but for now, breathe my friend.

cymru523 said...

I am sure all is well. Good luck on your next u/s

Inlocoparentis said...

Thinking of you - I'm sure everything will be great. Enjoy the announcement - I'm sure everyone will be thrilled!!

NotesFrom2Moms said...

try to breathe and keep your head up. Thats all you can do... and frankly I think the anxiety is nature's way of preparing you for 18+ years of anxiety - so think of it as training!

tbean said...

Thinking of you and hoping for all the best tomorrow. I know it will go GREAT!

wishinghopingpraying said...

I am thinking of you and hoping for a great report tomorrow.

jamie said...

K, I'me sure everything will be perfect tomorrow, the announcement plate idea is great. and you should totally check the "more deserving" crap. No such thing. You and M have wished and hoped and planned and tried for so long and I'm sure are going to be wonderful mamma's to the little alien you will see on the screen tomorrow.

Lizzie said...

Thinking of you. It's going to be good news.

dreamsandfalsealarms said...

I'm hoping everyting is well, and that you update us soon!